Fighting adult acne

Assalamualaikum & selamat sejahtera.. Its been a long break since my last entry.. Not that nothing is going on but i just don't feel like writing. 😅 forgive me.

So, as the title mentioned. I have been fighting for the adult acne for almost a year now. You would never know how frustrating it is to see your previously clear skin (not flawless of coarse) turned into sea of oil with multiple mountain peaks and scars (read: pimple & acne scars) mostly on the forehead.  It was painful to see and felt too. Its not that i do nothing bout it but sometimes i was too tired to try. Lots of money spent to multiple skincare product & facial treatment at spa. It will started to clear in the first week but come again in the 2 nd week. I do not know what exactly went wrong. Am i not patient enough or is it true that the product not suit me well? I truly do not know.

It was frustrating when at the age of mid 20's, your friend and juniors started become glowing, gorgeous and beautiful and you stucked up in teenage life fighting against acne again. 😣 luckily, i can hold myself and still go to public though with disastrous face.

Then, i just read a senior of mine wrote that this might be a test for me. Just being patient and start living. Every steps, every istighfar and every patient you made to calm yourself will always counted, inshaAllah..

So, i just share my routing here..

AM
- Cetaphil oily cleanser
- Simple toner
- herbaline ampoule
- Tidact 1% gel (antibiotic gel as spot treatment)
- mary kay clearproof moisturiser
- Herbaline pimple cream (forehead only)
- bio- essence sunscreen

PM
-cleanser
-toner
-ampoule
- Aztec Indian healing clay mask/ herbaline clay mask ( alternate daily. Yes, daily)
- toner
-ampoule
-the ordinary lactic acid 5% +HA 2%
-spot treatment
-moisturiser
- pimple cream

Long enough? 😂 just imagine how i managed to gp thrpugh every steps. 😆
Hopefully, i would find the remedy for this battle. Tired enough to try already.

So, if u have any suggestion which also not too costly, please do let me know.. Thank you.

My Skincare

Assalamualaikum..
Apa khabar?? terasa nak rant about my skincare.

Currently, i am having a bad breakouts after about 3 years of acne-free. The last time that I broke into bad breakout was when I change my face wash to korean-based skincare (I bought during my trip there). I turn into complete mess when my skin didn't back to normal even after I changed to my old face wash. After that, I found 'Simple' product that claimed to suit sensitive skin. It work tremendously for my skin which makes me loyal to them for 3 years. But, i can only suit the blue one which is for oily skin. It have these bits of exfoliators which didn't make my skin too dry. However, i still did have some pimples due to hormonal and some dry patches once in a while. So, Tidact gel and olive oil always come to the rescue when needed.


So, now I just feel that I want to try something new ( just because..😜) i jz want something that could make my skin bright not fair but at least glow cause i think my skin has become so dull. So, I try to change to everyone called as gentle cleanser, 'Cetaphil'. I bought the trial pack containing 95ml of gentle cleanser n moisturising cream. Very small and nice for travel. I really hope that they will make wonder to my skin. Besides that, I also add St Ives fresh skin scrub just to have 'glow skin'..😅.
Unfortunately, my face started develop small bumps around my forehead (which is not my common place of acne) and it keeps on multiplying. I just stop both products and come back to normal routine where it resolved. Then, my 'gatal tangan' again I wanted to try Klairs product that also everyone holy grail. I bought the rich moist foam cleanser. And Garden of eden serum for acne. Too bad that both products causing me very very bad breakouts with cytis painful acne...😭😭😭😭. I am not sure which one did worse. I jz thought the Klairs cleanser doesn't suit me so i stopped, but the new acne still coming out.. So, I stopped my serum. N then I saw my face stopped producing cystic acne.. Pheeww.. perhaps I am not suit with tea tree oil which are the based product for the Klairs cleanser and the serum. 😣. Because of my red and painful acne, I didn't dare to use the exfoliator wash of Simple. Afraid that it will make the condition worse. So, i just use my cetaphil cleanser and clay mask from innisfree. The cystic acne dried up very quickly and the scars started to fade after 2 weeks.. But, the joy didn't last long when all the tiny bumps which looks like white heads started to appear vigorously through out my face..😪😪.  And now I am looking for the new cleanser that works wonder to my skin. Hopefully, anyone could suggest me something..ok. Thats all my rant. I just feel so bad that Cetaphil, Klairs and tea tree oil didn't work for my skin or just perhaps I chose the wrong one.😔😔.

Wanita dan cantik

assalamualaikum..
Salam Ramadhan.. Sedar x yg Ramadhan bakal pergi? Mlm ni dah malam 24 Ramadhan..😣😣pantas nya masa berlalu. Entah apa je KPI yang telah dicapai.😪

So, saje je nk cerita.. Almaklumlah Ramadhan bakal berakhir dan syawal bakal menjelma. Jadinya, baju raya mesti lah ada kan? Sekarang, tengah posting kanak2.. Sibuknya Allah je tau. X sedar masa berlalu dan x sedar dah nak raya.😅

Maka, berbekalkan kudrat yg sedia ada bertapaklah kaki sorg2 pergi mood republik dan jalan TAR  utk mendapatkan baju raya. Allah..ramainya manusia!! Tp, baju yg dijual semua harga x macam sale pun. Dengan trend sekarang yang baju semua atas lutut..😣 shawl yang bermacam corak, cantik dan mostly x jarang tp kelabuhannya sukar menepati citarasa. Takkk!! X kata sy baik n pakai tudung labuh2, tak.. Just self preference and self confidence. Mmg ikut hati nak je beli tudung bunga2, kain pucci, corak kl tower tu..tp, takut x pakai sebab nk kne adjust kelabuhannya.. Malas nak bertekak dgn abg (kandung) dipagi raya nnt. Boleh buat gaduh kot. (Tahun lepas dah gaduh dah sbb shawl je pun😪)

So, motif menulis ni sbnrnye nak cakap, ikutlah dan pilihlah trend mana yg berkenan dihati janji menepati syariat. Tutup mana yang perlu. Longgar dan tidak terdedah. X dilupakan, berbelanja tu jangan lah sampai membazir. Raya sekali je. So, make sure cari baju yang boleh pakai even after raya k. Pesanan drp insan yg sangaaaattt lah cerewet pasal baju n tudung. Bukan x boleh bergaya, yg penting syariat diutama. Adios!

Selamat hari raya in advance!! Just in case x post pape sampai raya..😅😅
Ampun maaf dipinta..😊

Rant over my life (please ignore)

Assalamualaikum..
Apa khabar? Sihat semua?
Sy x brp sihat.. Cuma batuk sikit dekat 3 minggu..
Hari ni barulah nk g jmpe dr selepas lama berfikir dan musyawarah..

Sebenarnya sy ni jenis jarang sgt sakit.. Kalau demam tu adalah 1x setahun.. Or else, selesema (urti) pn 1/2 kali je kena dlm setahun.. Tu yang x hirau sgt kalau sakit sbb tahu antibodi badan kuat n x perlukan ubat.. 💪💪  hehe..
Anyway, jz nk gtau perasaan org yg jarang sakit ni kalau sakit, dia punya mengada lebih.. Kadang2 tu tau dah sakit sikit je pn tp mencanang cerita mcm teruk sgt..😅
Tp, deep in my heart aq suka kalau sakit.. Rasa ada perhatian sikit.. Ada org kisah (walaupun hanyalah kwn2 yg jmpe sebentar cuma. Atau mgkn diorg risau berjangkut kt diorg😅) x kisahlah.. Its jz happy, x tau nape.. Mgkn sbb aq selalu in denial n said that i am strong n i will always be fine.. But, at this time round i know I was not well yet i still have to act strong.. Kadang2 x tau nk cite kt siapa.. Who cares anyway? Nk mengadu kt ibu ayah takut diorg risau.. Tu yg mengadu kt abg kandung je mampu.. Tp yelah.. Like he cares anyway.. Dia pn sama je ngan aq, always take things light.. Maybe sbb tu dia nampak relax je..😏.

So, in the end.. Me n my dear self.. Sihat or sakit suatu ujian.. Adakah ianya akan menjadi penghalang utk terus beribadah kpd Allah?

Tp aq x gtau pn lg kn aq sakit apa? Haha.. X pelah.. Its nothing serious.. Really, nothing serious..😊

Marriage is not a destination

Assalamualaikum..
Today, i just feel like writing about marriage..
Not mine, but just a thought..

Alhamdulillah, sejak menginjak ke usia 24 ni x putus2 lah jemputan diterima daripada sahabat handai.. Daripada kawan sekolah rendah, menengah, asasi mahupun degree.. Alhamdulillah, i am happy for them n i do pray for their happiness.. It seems that time flies so fast that i could not belive that my friends are getting married..

Nevertheless, the stories of broken marriage always  alarmed me.. One after another.. somehow, i never know that 2 souls who have promised to live together forever can be broken and separated.. I might not understand as i have never been in one.. But, it makes us the single afraid to get married.. I know that it was like sailing a boat.. Sometimes the sea was calm and peaceful, but it may change to storm in no time.. But, to see it wrecked always broke my heart..

So, i think it's okay to marry late then marry a wrong person.. Maybe, He delayed my time because He knew that I can hardly attached to one. He let me free to learn more, explore more and appreciate more of His knowledge and His world.. Besides, searching for the true meaning of living in this worldly life besides than just living..

I jz want to share that i jz lost someone that i really hope to spend the rest of my life.. It took me sometime to recover, but yes it will never heal.. The scar was there and it hurts sometime, yet it still keep me smiling of remembering the memories... It taught me that we can only plan, but He has the masterplan and His plan always be the best.. And it gives me strength to support my colleagues who experienced the same.. At this age, we're not looking for a temporary companion and fun but a serious and long term relationship to sail the boat to a same and permanent destination, jannah inshaAllah..

In conclusion, may Allah bless all the marriage couple with sakinah, mawaddah wa rahmah.. May it lasts till jannah, inshaAllah.. (Not just for the sake of #tilljannah but a truthful prayers) and may He grants us "the single" a peaceful life and guidance to improvise ourselves and of coarse a pious, patience and great husband to be with, inshaAllah aminn..😊

Fadh turns 24!!

Its been a while since my last visit...
Blogging is just a way of me expressing what i can't at my social media as there's no like or share button here..
So, I felt there's freedom upon writing my personal life here. Something that was in my mind but I can't say freely.

*too much chattering*

So, Alhamdulillah Allah still gave me another year to be appreciated, to submit to Him and to repent over my sins before He take me out of my life. Alhamdulillah.

I celebrated my birthday at Emergency Department which is my current posting. I would not say celebrating, its just welcoming. This is because I had my shift until 11 pm but I dragged my shift to 2am.. *fuhh* time flies so fast.. Pity my housemates who waited for me to be back at 11 until 12.30 and they jz fall asleep later. I never expect anyone to celebrate my birthday. Its jz another day to everyone. Nothing really amazing happen when I was born, anyway. The next morning, I had a subsequent shift at 8.30 am.. *its so tiring.. really!* yet, again time flies so fast.. ED is a fast moving department. full of drama and events. Then, they managed to surprise me with a birthday cake and present!! i really-really not expecting it. I was too busy with my shift and my incomplete forensics report (procrastinator..duhh..) that I forget about my personal life. I felt like I helped someone when I was there and I felt beneficial. I always had this negative thought inside me that I am useless, worthless and not deserve to live anymore. Felt alone in this world. Trying to be strong when everyone around but shattered to be dust when I was all alone. Thus, I will always paste a smile to everyone so that they will not detect the tears, the sadness and the sorrows. I am in charged of my mind, my action and my behaviour. Thus, I will fight my own feelings and implant a new seeds of good expectations, prayers and keep on reciting my aim for today.

Actually, I realised that our subconscious mind will filter the information to the brain. They will assume most of the thing that we focused on as important. Thus, if u see all bad things, u will create a bad subconscious mind and vice versa.

So, in conclusion, age is just a rental for us to make use of it. Benefits it well and hopefully, we create a magnificent subconscious mind.

AD journey

Assalamualaikum..
First and foremost, lets be silent for a while for what happened in Aleppo, Syria..
(If u didn't know bout it, go search for it..it is not viral as France, but it cause more damage)













Sy masih berminat utk menulis ttg my AD journey..
It have been a month (x sangka😆😆) since i start the journey.. 28/3/2016 was my first day of the AD journey.. Started with lots of courage, guides and menus to make sure i stay on the track.. Stumble multiple times in between (especially during weekends  and holidays😪) I may not lose so much for an Atkiners, but its satisfying enough that I lose 3kg in a month.. As I always remember my Prof's advice to reduce the weight slowly, cause it may impair your metabolism/body system.. Still,  my family noticed my changes ( it pleased me already😆)

My new aim is to achieve my ideal weight, which is 45kg which i never achieved since secondary school (primary school not remember😅). I am not strictly on AD, but, i do stayed away from rice (or having very small amount, in front of my mum🙈), minimal breads, still big no for fruits, no sugary drinks, plenty plain water.. I wish that i could jog more but, lots of excuses by myself 😅

I really hope that I can maintain the current weight which is good enough..or lose even more, hopefully..

Just share my menu today:
Breakfast: 2 boiled egg masak sambal
Lunch: ikan goreng kunyit, pucuk manis masak lemak
Dinner: sardines, cucumber+sambal belacan

I never knew that i could survive with this diet without getting hungry..
I started to fall in love with Caesar salad n grilled chicken..
But, no money no talk lah.. Makan je lah apa yg ada..😁😁
Student lah kata kn.. So, farewell n see u again..